I CAN'T FRIGGIN SLEEP!!!!!!

whhhhhhhhattttt the monkey fart!! POO ginger nuggets of COW!!!
Ahhhahahahahahah.

I can't sleep. I'm so hyper. WHY WHY WHY!!!! And because i'm up.. i should be doing something productive.. but no. Instead.. i'm sitting in my fav. shirt.. with very ugly baggy old booty shorts from Victoria Secret that Allen swears i have to throw away, LOL they don't even hug my butt since i don't have one. AHAhahahahaha. how sad.

I figure I might as well give you guys another update right! Sooooo.. let's see..

Right now I'm in San Diego again.

Blah. I know right? I hop around too much. I'm gonna do my mini story/timeline update again:

-I came back to SD on... Thursday because I find out that there's something black growing in my dad's hip. They don't know what it is yet.. ::sigh:: so.. of course me being a baby.. i just started crying without even knowing the details. I cried the whole 2 hour drive home by myself. I get home and my parents look at me all crazy cause it's not even phasing them. My brother starts yelling at my parents.. telling them that they can't be telling me this stuff cause i can't handle it.

truth. it's true. I can't. I don't think I can handle.. the idea of death at all yet. I cried for months when Boba passed away. and can hardly keep myself from crying when I think of him.

-My mom tells my sister.. she had.. the same.. horrible dream.. that she had before my Uncle passed away except this time with my dad... T-T i know right.. moving on.

-Friday I end up.. doing absolutely nothing like the loner i am. LOL. except cleaning of course. I cleaned the house.. and had dinner with the family.

-Saturday my sister randomly says that we're having.. a mini celebration for Baby Daniel (my newest nephew), so my family and I head back to Orange County for that. Had an amazing time. Being around lots of family is truly the best feeling.

*So.. guess what... while my aunties were sitting down with my mom chatting away.. they start talking about.. me.. I was preparing myself for the worst right, since koreans are so judgmental. Surprisingly, my auntie starts saying, "Yeah your shi-lang (future new husband- which she's referring to Allen AHAHAHAHA- WHOLE nother story) is such a lucky man." She proceeds to look at my mom.. and continues to say " Esther can cook, do makeup, studies well, has a one of a kind personality, i mean she's good at everything she does". * TIME OUT *. So.. as soon as she said the first compliment my jaw kinda dropped.. My aunties never say anything positive to me. THey've always told me.." lose weight.. don't go to culinary school. go to harvard. why are you with that boy. You're dark. Don't even drink water at night. " so you could imagine, me hearing that come out of THEIR mouths.. complete shock. i probably drooled a little bit. ahahahhaa

-Anyway Yesterday I ended up going to shoot pool with one of my besties. Freddy bear! (The guy that made the CHAE sign last time i flew in LOL since he thought he wouldn't recognize me cause of the weightloss) AHHAHAHAH. Oober fun. drank a bit. got loose. Enjoyed myself. First time in a while.

-I just totally lost my train of thoughts. darn.

moving on...

Mm..

OH YEAH!!!!!!

CONTEST CONTEST CONTEST!! Did i say CONTEST?!!?!

So I'm holding a contest.. DETAILS will be put up SOON!

xpinkxx (aka SUPER UBER HOT SEXY PAM) gave me the idea.. of doing a COOKING competition.. whilee incorporating.. a makeup look to go with it. Ahahah Pam also said.. to bust out the hooker heels. LOL. What do you guys think? I recently got a HUGEEEEEE gift package from Sigma! Their brushes are...PHENOMENAL.. I'll be doing a 1-4th place.. with 1st place getting the FULL BRUSH SET!! It's like.. 10+ brushes. NO KIDDING. they're seriously really good too. VERY similar to MAC although some of the bristles are different.

So let me know what you guys think!

Alright I'm gonna stop.. cause my brain is slowing down.

But here's my photo journal within the last few days =) enjoy!

We OOVOO almost every night.. and laugh away.. at the stupidest things. I burp. He looks at me.. in total disgust AhAHHAHAA

I even cried. because of stress. LOL. what else is new right?!
yeah.. he laughs at himself when he THINKS he's funny. Him and his oober denarded jokes. lol

OKKKKK so My BESTY from Arizona is coming to see me with her baby and husband!! I haven't seen her in 4 years!!! Since... our fight. Do you guys remember me talking about how I apologized and it took the biggest burden away? Well I get to finally see her!!

Yeah.. We were 14 here.. and uhh.. yeah.. the hair.. the brows.. everything. LOL. muy no bueno
LOOK AT MY SHOES! AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA! remember the cropped pants. oh my.
Made potato au gratin
Along with stuffed tomato & bell pepper duxelle (mushroom stuffing)
Made shrimp scampi pasta!??! YUMMMMMM.. i was eating it.. and totally forgot to take a picture.. so I took a picture after i took a bite


My uber cute nephews and i (Paul the smallest one, Brandon the med. one lol and Justin the eldest one)





I made a Recipe Journal! I bought the notebook from Borders for $3!! because it was 75% off!!! WOOO.. then I made tabs and categorized all my favorite cuisines. It's my newest obsession. I've been running to everyone asking them their best dishes ahahah


Paul's so cute. He kept jumping on my bed and laughing at himself cause he was having so much fun. He's only a year and half crazy right!


Baby Daniel and I
My older sister and Baby Daniel <3>

OKkk my newest projecT !!! I initially wanted to buy a Hello Kitty laptop sleeve (the original from Sanrio.. not bootleg) but it was going for $50!!!! so i decided to make my own.

I started off by buying this sleeve from Target for $13.00

Then for $1.00 i bought this.. moving packing material...

At target I bought the Love love love hankerchief for $1.00!! I didn't know what i was going to use it for.. then i bought the black and white fabric at the japanese store for $3.00.. I got the packing material.. sized it.. then wrapped the fabrics around it.. then SEWED it into the laptop sleeve.

Added the Apple sticker that came with my MacBook Pro.. AND WALLA!!!! DOPENESS! and it's so stuffed that i'm positive it'll protect my laptop!

I bought this uber cute pink bag at Walmart for $10.. and found a black ribbon thingy around the house.. LOL.. and i'm using it to carry my laptop

Ok for my laptop accessories (charger, headset, itouch, etc) I bought this black pouch at the Japanese store for $1.50.
With the left over fabric... i sized it to the pouch and sewed it.. so that it'd fit around the pouch..

WALA!!!!!!! Cute right?!?! Fits all my laptopy stuff!!

Okeyyyyys All done :) I love you ladies@!!

Thanks for reading up on me.. and checking up with how i'm doing.

Especially the emails. I'm telling you... it's like therapy! I'm actually going to go KARAOKE with Sarahhhhh on Wednesday who I'm meeting through my emails! <3

BTW: If you haven't found me on twitter. FIND ME!!

I'm now... addicted. ::sigh:: LOL

http://twitter.com/jinahchae

Read More

Thinking of him.

Hey loves!

It's beeen just about 2 months I think... since I last blogged. So many things have happened..

Just a quick rundown of some Random things that've happened to me. I'm not exactly in the mood to.. edit my writing.. so I'm going to write very.. freely. I'm going to tell you guys the truth.. and nothing but the truth.. so bare with my... depressing.. desperate.. joyous.. frustrated... moments..

-I got some sort of flu.. for a week and had to drop out of my Garde Mange class late September

-Passed my cooking practical with a 94 in the beginning of October

-Spent the last two weeks in New York with Allen.. we cooked dinner every night together.. watched football every Sunday & Monday...

-Allen bought me a promise ring

-Bump on boob is finally starting to go away.. almost gone

-I've secured an externship site at Union Square Cafe in Union Square (NY).

-I need to find a place to live ASAP in the city.

-I'm in California right now...staying at my sister's house in Ladera Ranch (Orange County) until Nov. 27 then I go back to NY.

-Sister gave birth to her second son Daniel Jeremiah Park

-I'm at my sister's house.. to nanny my sister's 2 year old while she nurses

-I just about went through a 10 nervous breakdown while my sister was in the hospital giving birth because my nephew was making me feel helpless.

-Nephews in his terrible 2's. Every second= another tantrum... after tantrum.. after tantrum. ::sigh:: so hard.

-I've quit smoking for just over 3 weeks now... and I'm still fighting my urges.

-I'm desperate to smoke. I should feel proud of myself.. but I don't. I'm happy it's not effecting the people i love around me.. health wise.. but.... smoking wasn't just a physical habit.. it helped me cope with stress.. it filled in my gaps throughout the day.. it was emotional.. and mental..

-my habit of smoking has been replaced with eating. -___________-; depressing isn't it?!!?!?

-I've gained weight. ::SIGH!!!!!!::

-My weight gain is making me feel insecure.

-I don't want to even.. wear nice clothes.. or do makeup because of my weight gain.

-I've received products to test out.. but haven't managed to play with them yet.

-My camera is dead and I didn't bring my charger from san diego= no videos.

-I started a food recipe journal. Bought a random mini notebook at Borders... and made tabs.. and now i'm loggging all my fav. recipes.. including recipes of my own.

-I've started a journey to really get down and dirty with learning to cook. Starting with Korean food. I want to learn more and more and more.. about the foundations of my cultures food. Food tells you history. It's an amazing thing.

-I've been cooking something new EVERY DAY. Something I've never done.

-I'm obsessed with Hello Kitty. OH EM GEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

-I got a new macbook pro. But am still learning to use it.

-I love my boyfriend more.. than.. I can explain.

-I've decided to settle with an associates degree from my culinary school rather than pursuing my bachelor's because I feel as if I'll be wasting $64,000 for an extra 2 years of general ed classes that will never do me any good with a bachelor's degree in culinary arts.

-I'm starting to plan my business for when i graduate.

-I'm going to pursue my book on asian makeup.

-I'm craving girlfriend companionship.

-why is it so difficult for me to find good girlfriends. Once again.. for the hundred thousandth time.. i ask this same question.

-i'm a mess a mess a mess a mess a mess!!!!!

-I can't get the elmo song out of my head since my nephew lovesssssssssssss the elmo song.

-I can't stop thinking about the "ktown girls" video on youtube cause it's so flipping funnny. "Like.. OH MY *OD!" ahahahahhaha

-I need contest ideas to do a contest so i can give away gift packages of brand new SIGMA brushes.

-i redesigned my mom's cafe.. painted the walls from this nasty teal color to a 3 tone color.. one wall= dark reddish.. one wall= peanut butterish.. one wall= latte ish... made it into a.. paris kind of theme.. with coffee art on the walls.. A paris adhesive picture.. i painted Hiedi's cafe in HUGEEEEE decorative writing on the main wall..

-spent a whole weekend spray painting ugly cafe chairs black.. to make it more modern..

-i've been a slave since i've been home. Haven't even unpacked my belongings yet.. and it's been 2 weeks.

-I've yet to call any of my friends here in California because i have no time to myself.

-I'm also carless so i'm stuck in Orange County.. without anyone to go out with :(

-I miss my boyfriend so much.. i feel like I'm missing half of me.

-I want to get married in the next 2 years.

-I had a nightmare with every stress of mine haunting me.. HORRIBLE DREAM. i woke up.. wanting to run away somewhere.

-i wish i were 13 again.

-Did i mention i have the best boyfriend ever? Whoever said love doesn't exist is WRONG!!!!! He completes me. Literally.

-He's flying in for Thanksgiving to meet my family. official.

-We're flying back to new york together.

-I seriously need to find a place to live in the city. feeling hopeless.

-I'm in desperate need of a way to make extra money. My min. wage externship in the city is DEFinitely not going to cover my living expenses. Stressed.

-i feel sad at the moment. i don't know why. i just do.

All done =)

Was that random or what?!?!?!

Ready to see some random pictures?!!?!

Sorry girls.. I'm not as bubbly like i usually am.. although........ this really is an insight to everything that's running through my mind.

Fritada dish i made in my America's Kitchen.. made by me.. plated by me :)

Kim-Bap that i made for my brother in law.. and my nephew

The dinner i made tonight for my sister.. my brother in law and my nephew:

Seared Filet Mignon topped with roasted onions & whole garlic with a balsamic, red wine, mushroom reduced sauce.. a side of roasted asparagus and mashed potatoes.

bare with me girls..

<3

Jinah

Read More